Cleaning House.

Somewhere in Arizona (1983-84?)

I hate throwing things away. It is painful, actually. It makes me physically ill to throw things away that I might miss later on down the road. Deep down inside I know it's good to purge every now and then...hang on to what's really important, and let the rest slide. I know this, but have a hard time coming to grips with it.

We cleaned out our basement this weekend. Like most folks I had boxes full of nostalgia...lots of things to remind me of my childhood such as old report cards, certificates, awards, pictures, drawings and the like. I also had all of my college notes (might need those, huh), all of the letters I have ever received (scary), and every journal or attempt at a journal I have ever written (real scary). Well, I turned 6 large boxes into two, and feel better in most respects. I feel better because most of that stuff was dumb to keep in the first place...(papers written in high school, c'mon, really?) I kept the photos, the important letters (not the pathetic, sappy "love" letters), and I kept most things from my trips to Idaho and Russia...those two trips really mean alot to me, so I kept that era of my life. Someday they may get purged as well, but I'm not ready for that just yet.

All in all, it was a good thing to do. It brought back a flood of memories...some good, some not so good, but it forced me to think about hitting my mid-30's and realize what I have done in that span of time. I have had a variety of experiences, and feel fortunate for that. Travel has been a large part of my growth and I have realized just how important it is for sanity, and for keeping a proper perspective on things. (mental note - must travel more).

As it all went up in a ball of bonfire-smoke last night, I thought I would write about it...accumulating more crap...but in the world of computers, cables, and screens instead of in a box in my basement. I hope someday I'll be able to burn this box and start another chapter too...